I’m already at one.

In a turn of events that my more morbid friends have outright demanded since the deaths of Hepburn and Hackett, Bob Hope is no longer with us. The rule of threes is satisfied with alphabetic symmetry, and a decent guy who has been old since I was born finally gets his eternal reward. Everyone goes home happy.

Best Journalism Ever, Part I: We Snark, You Agree

Puerto Rico protests being used as a bombing site; the Navy stops the bombing tests and closes the base; Puerto Ricans protest the resulting loss of jobs.Fox News, and no one else, has the story.

Best Journalism Ever, Part II: This Story Has a Chapter Missing

from today’s Post-Dispatch:

A St. Louis toddler who had been the focus of an intense search since she disappeared on July 19 was found “healthy and happy” in Detroit on Sunday afternoon, the FBI and St. Louis police reported.

When she was found, 23-month-old Denisha Hair was with the teenage girl who had taken her from her home in the 5900 block of Martin Luther King Drive. Denisha’s parents had allowed the teenager, whose full name they didn’t know, to take their daughter to the store, thinking they would return after a short time, police said.

Wait wait, whoa, what? They didn’t know the girl; the girl said, “Hi, we met a minute ago, I am taking your baby to the store”; mom and dad said, “Yeah, that sounds all right”? I really, really want to know more about that. Not the Post, though. The Post finds this detail uninteresting.