I was e-conversing with a friend of mine this week about the Patriot Act and what, in fact, is the Big Deal. As these things often do, it got a smidgen off-topic, but I wrote something to her that I thought bore repeating to anyone within the sound of my voice. To wit:

This race, incidentally, is giving me a goddamned migraine. I have absolutely, absolutely no idea what to do in November. I’m thinking of writing in the lady who sings that milkshake song. For the record, if Dean gets the nomination, it’s “four more years” all the way. Not since John mcCain have I had such a palpable sense that a man, if elected, would kill us all. A man who, I enjoy mentioning at every opportunity (though, bizarrely, so does he) left the Episcopal church over an argument about a bike path.

But I realized something this week, thanks to your previous e-mail and a recent episode of the Daily Show crystallizing it for me: nobody can point to a specific anything about anything. It’s all feelings and symbolic gestures. What I’m most upset about regarding the upcoming election is that I have a cable news channel on in the background every night, and I have had to scratch and claw to find out anybody’s position on anything. If you go home tonight and watch any network’s news, all you will hear about is who they think’s going to win. If Gephardt woos the unions, he might win! Dean shouted and waved his arms around; he’s not going to win! Kerry is polling well; he might win! I don’t think Sharpton will win! Will the president win? Who has the best chance of winning so the president doesn’t win? Suddenly, it looks like Edwards might win!

Why? What do any of these people want to do?

Never comes up. Intensely vexing.

(While what I wrote was true, upon reflection I realize it was only half the story. They don’t just talk about who’s going to win. Sometimes, they talk about who’s raised the most money. So, I apologize to CNN.)

After thinking about it, I realized, This is the 21st century! I can just go to their web sites. So I did, and these were the first two things I saw:

General Clark’s home page greeted me with,

Money, message and momentum. Wes Clark has all three. Online contributions are steadily growing. The campaign is on track to fully fuel its $2 million fundraising train. Clark’s message of an even better America is attracting growing numbers of diverse voters - across the Granite State and beyond. And a strong showing in New Hampshire will give Clark the momentum he needs going into the February 3rd primaries.

So, in summation, money money money, win win win. Also, a better America.

Disheartened, I went to look in on Joltin’ Joe Lieberman:

1/23 — The reviews are in and the press is calling it Joe’s “best debate performance ever!” In the last debate before the New Hampshire primary, perhaps the most closely watched of the entire election, Joe was “the real winner of the debate.” Catch video clips of Joe’s performance by clicking on the links below. And don’t miss the after debate party captured in Joe’s NH Video Journal.

I found this very useful in my selection process. Kelis it is!