Get a load of this crap:

“In Kadisaya, we haven’t found much of this, we look for it on a daily basis,” said company commander Captain Jon Cecalupo.

“This was found hidden in a basket of vegetables they are selling on the market, these are places we usually wouldn’t have looked.”

You’re a professional journalist. Take out your style guide (it’s the dusty one, underneath the pile of Highlights magazines) and look up “Comma Splice.”

“It’s a quote from an interview. I don’t know. He just sounded like he was splicing.”

1 Web nostalgia. sheesh.

Google is taking over the world! I hadn’t been paying much attention to search engines lately- because really, why would you?- but recently I’ve been dragged back intoTha Game (just when I thought dat I was out, dey pull me back in) and one thing I can’t help but notice about search engines is that they don’t exist. Everything that used to be a search engine is now the giant green Oz head to Google’s tiny little balding wizard.

AOL Search? It’s powered by Google.
Netscape? Google.
Yahoo? Yahoo is completely Google with a wig on. Go see for yourself.
That guy on the street you asked for directions to the restaurant? Probably Google.

They see you when you’re sleeping, they know when you’re awake, and it’s only a matter of time before they start tracking a list of what you personally searched for. And giving the list to Hitler.

Did anyone else ever use Infoseek? Man, I used to love Infoseek. What about Mr. Showbiz? Remember Mr. Showbiz? And then Disney bought up all those sites back in the nineties and killed them like it was a vendetta?

Good times.