While I certainly appreciate the Secretaries of Defense and Labor and All That, I do sometimes wish there was a Department of Just Making Life Better, and that it was a cabinet level position, and that the Secretary was me.

It’s not all about me, technically, but I do think this: as many as seven of America’s biggest problems would be solved all at once if parking meters took pennies.

And by “America’s biggest problems,” I mean “the things that bug me personally and therefore must bug everyone else.”

Think about it. You could park your car and get rid of all those f***ing pennies. If you’re like me, (God help you, and) your house is (from a structural standpoint) 74% pennies.

No one in America should have lode-bearing pennies.

Of course, meters would have to be as big as phone booths. But as someone who wouldn’t be faced with that problem, I say damn the torpedoes!

 
-- jimski, February 25, 2007, 2:53 am

One Response to “grand unification theory”

  1. TR Says:

    Between Coinstar and my debit card, I’ve pretty much eliminated the penny problem. Maybe as Secretary you could appoint a special committee on parking meters accepting debit cards. I think some cities have meters that accept prepaid debit-like cards, but frankly, if I could plan ahead well enough to purchase a meter debit card, I could get change. Which makes my debit card/meter marriage concept so nice.

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